“Yes, the maidy’s well enough,” said Miss Avery, “for those that is, who don’t suffer from sneezing.” And she cackled maliciously. “I’ve seen Charlie Wilcox go out to my lads in hay time–oh, they ought to do this–they mustn’t do that–he’d learn them to be lads. And just then the tickling took him. He has it from his father, with other things. There’s not one Wilcox that can stand up against a field in June–I laughed fit to burst while he was courting Ruth.”
“My brother gets hay fever too,” said Margaret.
“This house lies too much on the land for them. Naturally, they were glad enough to slip in at first. But Wilcoxes are better than nothing, as I see you’ve found.”
Margaret laughed.
“They keep a place going, don’t they? Yes, it is just that.”
“They keep England going, it is my opinion.”
But Miss Avery upset her by replying: “Ay, they breed like rabbits. Well, well, it’s a funny world. But He who made it knows what He wants in it, I suppose. If Mrs. Charlie is expecting her fourth, it isn’t for us to repine.”
“They breed and they also work,” said Margaret, conscious of some invitation to disloyalty, which was echoed by the very breeze and by the songs of the birds. “It certainly is a funny world, but so long as men like my husband and his sons govern it, I think it’ll never be a bad one–never really bad.”
“No, better’n nothing,” said Miss Avery, and turned to the wych-elm.
On their way back to the farm she spoke of her old friend much more clearly than before. In the house Margaret had wondered whether she quite distinguished the first wife from the second. Now she said: “I never saw much of Ruth after her grandmother died, but we stayed civil. It was a very civil family. Old Mrs. Howard never spoke against anybody, nor let anyone be turned away without food. Then it was never ‘Trespassers will be prosecuted’ in their land, but would people please not come in. Mrs. Howard was never created to run a farm.”
“Had they no men to help them?” Margaret asked.
Miss Avery replied: “Things went on until there were no men.”
“Until Mr. Wilcox came along,” corrected Margaret, anxious that her husband should receive his dues.
“I suppose so; but Ruth should have married a–no disrespect to you to say this, for I take it you were intended to get Wilcox any way, whether she got him first or no.”
“Whom should she have married?”
“A soldier!” exclaimed the old woman. “Some real soldier.”
Margaret was silent. It was a criticism of Henry’s character far more trenchant than any of her own. She felt dissatisfied.
“But that’s all over,” she went on. “A better time is coming now, though you’ve kept me long enough waiting. In a couple of weeks I’ll see your lights shining through the hedge of an evening. Have you ordered in coals?”
“We are not coming,” said Margaret firmly. She respected Miss Avery too much to humour her. “No. Not coming. Never coming. It has all been a mistake. The furniture must be repacked at once, and I am very sorry but I am making other arrangements, and must ask you to give me the keys.”
“Certainly, Mrs. Wilcox,” said Miss Avery, and resigned her duties with a smile.
Relieved at this conclusion, and having sent her compliments to Madge, Margaret walked back to the station. She had intended to go to the furniture warehouse and give directions for removal, but the muddle had turned out more extensive than she expected, so she decided to consult Henry. It was as well that she did this. He was strongly against employing the local man whom he had previously recommended, and advised her to store in London after all.
But before this could be done an unexpected trouble fell upon her.
Chapter 34
It was not unexpected entirely. Aunt Juley’s health had been bad all the winter. She had had a long series of colds and coughs, and had been too busy to get rid of them. She had scarcely promised her niece “to really take my tiresome chest in hand,” when she caught a chill and developed acute pneumonia. Margaret and Tibby went down to Swanage. Helen was telegraphed for, and that spring party that after all gathered in that hospitable house had all the pathos of fair memories. On a perfect day, when the sky seemed blue porcelain, and the waves of the discreet little bay beat gentlest of tattoos upon the sand, Margaret hurried up through the rhododendrons, confronted again by the senselessness of Death. One death may explain itself, but it throws no light upon another: the groping inquiry must begin anew. Preachers or scientists may generalize, but we know that no generality is possible about those whom we love; not one heaven awaits them, not even one oblivion. Aunt Juley, incapable of tragedy, slipped out of life with odd little laughs and apologies for having stopped in it so long. She was very weak; she could not rise to the occasion, or realize the great mystery which all agree must await her; it only seemed to her that she was quite done up–more done up than ever before; that she saw and heard and felt less every moment; and that, unless something changed, she would soon feel nothing. Her spare strength she devoted to plans: could not Margaret take some steamer expeditions? were mackerel cooked as Tibby liked them? She worried herself about Helen’s absence, and also that she could be the cause of Helen’s return. The nurses seemed to think such interests quite natural, and perhaps hers was an average approach to the Great Gate. But Margaret saw Death stripped of any false romance; whatever the idea of Death may contain, the process can be trivial and hideous.
“Important–Margaret dear, take the Lulworth when Helen comes.”
“Helen won’t be able to stop, Aunt Juley. She has telegraphed that she can only get away just to see you. She must go back to Germany as soon as you are well.”
“How very odd of Helen! Mr. Wilcox–”
“Yes, dear?”
“Can he spare you?”
Henry wished her to come, and had been very kind. Yet again Margaret said so.
Mrs. Munt did not die. Quite outside her will, a more dignified power took hold of her and checked her on the downward slope. She returned, without emotion, as fidgety as ever. On the fourth day she was out of danger.
“Margaret–important,” it went on: “I should like you to have some companion to take walks with. Do try Miss Conder.”
“I have been a little walk with Miss Conder.”
“But she is not really interesting. If only you had Helen.”
“I have Tibby, Aunt Juley.”
“No, but he has to do his Chinese. Some real companion is what you need. Really, Helen is odd.”
“Helen is odd, very,” agreed Margaret.
“Not content with going abroad, why does she want to go back there at once?”
“No doubt she will change her mind when she sees us. She has not the least balance.”
That was the stock criticism about Helen, but Margaret’s voice trembled as she made it. By now she was deeply pained at her sister’s behaviour. It may be unbalanced to fly out of England, but to stop away eight months argues that the heart is awry as well as the head. A sick-bed could recall Helen, but she was deaf to more human calls; after a glimpse at her aunt, she would retire into her nebulous life behind some poste restante. She scarcely existed; her letters had become dull and infrequent; she had no wants and no curiosity. And it was all put down to poor Henry’s account! Henry, long pardoned by his wife, was still too infamous to be greeted by his sister-in-law. It was morbid, and, to her alarm, Margaret fancied that she could trace the growth of morbidity back in Helen’s life for nearly four years. The flight from Oniton; the unbalanced patronage of the Basts; the explosion of grief up on the Downs–all connected with Paul, an insignificant boy whose lips had kissed hers for a fraction of time. Margaret and Mrs. Wilcox had feared that they might kiss again. Foolishly: the real danger was reaction. Reaction against the Wilcoxes had eaten into her life until she was scarcely sane. At twenty-five she had an idee fixe. What hope was there for her as an old woman?
The more Margaret thought about it the more alarmed she became. For many months she had put the subject away, but it was too big to be slighted now. There was almost a taint of madness. Were all Helen’s actions to be governed by a tiny mishap, such as may happen to any young man or woman? Can human nature be constructed on lines so insignificant? The blundering little encounter at Howards End was vital. It propagated itself where graver intercourse lay barren; it was stronger than sisterly intimacy, stronger than reason or books. In one of her moods Helen had confessed that she still “enjoyed” it in a certain sense. Paul had faded, but the magic of his caress endured. And where there is enjoyment of the past there may also be
reaction–propagation at both ends.
Well, it is odd and sad that our minds should be such seed-beds, and we without power to choose the seed. But man is an odd, sad creature as yet, intent on pilfering the earth, and heedless of the growths within himself. He cannot be bored about psychology. He leaves it to the specialist, which is as if he should leave his dinner to be eaten by a steam-engine. He cannot be bothered to digest his own soul. Margaret and Helen have been more patient, and it is suggested that Margaret has succeeded–so far as success is yet possible. She does understand herself, she has some rudimentary control over her own growth. Whether Helen has succeeded one cannot say.
The day that Mrs. Munt rallied Helen’s letter arrived. She had posted it at Munich, and would be in London herself on the morrow. It was a disquieting letter, though the opening was affectionate and sane.
Dearest Meg,
Give Helen’s love to Aunt Juley. Tell her that I love, and have loved, her ever since I can remember. I shall be in London Thursday.
My address will be care of the bankers. I have not yet settled on a hotel, so write or wire to me there and give me detailed news. If Aunt Juley is much better, or if, for a terrible reason, it would be no good my coming down to Swanage, you must not think it odd if I do not come. I have all sorts of plans in my head. I am living abroad at present, and want to get back as quickly as possible. Will you please tell me where our furniture is. I should like to take out one or two books; the rest are for you.
Forgive me, dearest Meg. This must read like rather a tiresome letter, but all letters are from your loving
Helen
It was a tiresome letter, for it tempted Margaret to tell a lie. If she wrote that Aunt Juley was still in danger her sister would come. Unhealthiness is contagious. We cannot be in contact with those who are in a morbid state without ourselves deteriorating. To “act for the best” might do Helen good, but would do herself harm, and, at the risk of disaster, she kept her colours flying a little longer. She replied that their aunt was much better, and awaited developments.
Tibby approved of her reply. Mellowing rapidly, he was a pleasanter companion than before. Oxford had done much for him. He had lost his peevishness, and could hide his indifference to people and his interest in food. But he had not grown more human. The years between eighteen and twenty-two, so magical for most, were leading him gently from boyhood to middle age. He had never known young-manliness, that quality which warms the heart till death, and gives Mr. Wilcox an imperishable charm. He was frigid, through no fault of his own, and without cruelty. He thought Helen wrong and Margaret right, but the family trouble was for him what a scene behind footlights is for most people. He had only one suggestion to make, and that was characteristic.
“Why don’t you tell Mr. Wilcox?”
“About Helen?”
“Perhaps he has come across that sort of thing.”
“He would do all he could, but–”
“Oh, you know best. But he is practical.”
It was the student’s belief in experts. Margaret demurred for one or two reasons. Presently Helen’s answer came. She sent a telegram requesting the address of the furniture, as she would now return at once. Margaret replied, “Certainly not; meet me at the bankers at four.” She and Tibby went up to London. Helen was not at the bankers, and they were refused her address. Helen had passed into chaos.
Margaret put her arm round her brother. He was all that she had left, and never had he seemed more unsubstantial.
“Tibby love, what next?”
He replied: “It is extraordinary.”
“Dear, your judgment’s often clearer than mine. Have you any notion what’s at the back?”
“None, unless it’s something mental.”
“Oh–that!” said Margaret. “Quite impossible.” But the suggestion had been uttered, and in a few minutes she took it up herself. Nothing else explained. And London agreed with Tibby. The mask fell off the city, and she saw it for what it really is–a caricature of infinity. The familiar barriers, the streets along which she moved, the houses between which she had made her little journeys for so many years, became negligible suddenly. Helen seemed one with grimy trees and the traffic and the slowly-flowing slabs of mud. She had accomplished a hideous act of renunciation and returned to the One. Margaret’s own faith held firm. She knew the human soul will be merged, if it be merged at all, with the stars and the sea. Yet she felt that her sister had been going amiss for many years. It was symbolic the catastrophe should come now, on a London afternoon, while rain fell slowly.
Henry was the only hope. Henry was definite. He might know of some paths in the chaos that were hidden from them, and she determined to take Tibby’s advice and lay the whole matter in his hands. They must call at his office. He could not well make it worse. She went for a few moments into St. Paul’s, whose dome stands out of the welter so bravely, as if preaching the gospel of form. But within, St. Paul’s is as its surroundings–echoes and whispers, inaudible songs, invisible mosaics, wet footmarks crossing and recrossing the floor. Si monumentum requiris, circumspice: it points us back to London. There was no hope of Helen here.
Henry was unsatisfactory at first. That she had expected. He was overjoyed to see her back from Swanage, and slow to admit the growth of a new trouble. When they told him of their search, he only chaffed Tibby and the Schlegels generally, and declared that it was “just like Helen” to lead her relatives a dance.
“That is what we all say,” replied Margaret. “But why should it be just like Helen? Why should she be allowed to be so queer, and to grow queerer?”
“Don’t ask me. I’m a plain man of business. I live and let live. My advice to you both is, don’t worry. Margaret, you’ve got black marks again under your eyes. You know that’s strictly forbidden. First your aunt–then your sister. No, we aren’t going to have it. Are we, Theobald?” He rang the bell. “I’ll give you some tea, and then you go straight to Ducie Street. I can’t have my girl looking as old as her husband.”
“All the same, you have not quite seen our point,” said Tibby.
Mr. Wilcox, who was in good spirits, retorted, “I don’t suppose I ever shall.” He leant back, laughing at the gifted but ridiculous family, while the fire flickered over the map of Africa. Margaret motioned to her brother to go on. Rather diffident, he obeyed her.
“Margaret’s point is this,” he said. “Our sister may be mad.”
Charles, who was working in the inner room, looked round.
“Come in, Charles,” said Margaret kindly. “Could you help us at all? We are again in trouble.”
“I’m afraid I cannot. What are the facts? We are all mad more or less, you know, in these days.”
“The facts are as follows,” replied Tibby, who had at times a pedantic lucidity. “The facts are that she has been in England for three days and will not see us. She has forbidden the bankers to give us her address. She refuses to answer questions. Margaret finds her letters colourless. There are other facts, but these are the most striking.”
“She has never behaved like this before, then?” asked Henry.
“Of course not!” said his wife, with a frown.
“Well, my dear, how am I to know?”
A senseless spasm of annoyance came over her. “You know quite well that Helen never sins against affection,” she said. “You must have noticed that much in her, surely.”
“Oh yes; she and I have always hit it off together.”
“No, Henry–can’t you see? –I don’t mean that.”
She recovered herself, but not before Charles had observed her. Stupid and attentive, he was watching the scene.
“I was meaning that when she was eccentric in the past, one could trace it back to the heart in the long run. She behaved oddly because she cared for someone, or wanted to help them. There’s no possible excuse for her now. She is grieving us deeply, and that is why I am sure that she is not well. ‘Mad’ is too terrible a word, but she is not well. I shall never believe it. I shouldn’t discuss my sister with you if I thought she was well–trouble you about her, I mean.”
Henry began to grow serious. Ill-health was to him something perfectly definite. Generally well himself, he could not realize that we sink to it by slow gradations. The sick had no rights; they were outside the pale; one could lie to them remorselessly. When his first wife was seized, he had promised to take her down into Hertfordshire, but meanwhile arranged with a nursing-home instead. Helen, too, was ill. And the plan that he sketched out for her capture, clever and well-meaning as it was, drew its ethics from the wolf-pack.
“You want to get hold of her?” he said. “That’s the problem, isn’t it? She has got to see a doctor.”
“For all I know she has seen one already.”
“Yes, yes; don’t interrupt.” He rose to his feet and thought intently. The genial, tentative host disappeared, and they saw instead the man who had carved money out of Greece and Africa, and bought forests from the natives for a few bottles of gin. “I’ve got it,” he said at last. “It’s perfectly easy. Leave it to me. We’ll send her down to Howards End.”
“How will you do that?”
“After her books. Tell her that she must unpack them herself. Then you can meet her there.”
“But, Henry, that’s just what she won’t let me do. It’s part of her–whatever it is–never to see me.”
“Of course you won’t tell her you’re going. When she is there, looking at the cases, you’ll just stroll in. If nothing is wrong with her, so much the better. But there’ll be the motor round the corner, and we can run her up to a specialist in no time.”
Margaret shook her head. “It’s quite impossible.”
“Why?”
“It doesn’t seem impossible to me,” said Tibby; “it is surely a very tippy plan.”
“It is impossible, because–” She looked at her husband sadly. “It’s not the particular language that Helen and I talk if you see my meaning. It would do splendidly for other people, whom I don’t blame.”
“But Helen doesn’t talk,” said Tibby. “That’s our whole difficulty. She won’t talk your particular language, and on that account you think she’s ill.”
“No, Henry; it’s sweet of you, but I couldn’t.”
“I see,” he said; “you have scruples.”
“I suppose so.”
“And sooner than go against them you would have your sister suffer. You could have got her down to Swanage by a word, but you had scruples. And scruples are all very well. I am as scrupulous as any man alive, I hope; but when it is a case like this, when there is a question of madness–”
“I deny it’s madness.”
“You said just now–”
“It’s madness when I say it, but not when you say it.”
Henry shrugged his shoulders. “Margaret! Margaret!” he groaned. “No education can teach a woman logic. Now, my dear, my time is valuable. Do you want me to help you or not?”
“Not in that way.”
“Answer my question. Plain question, plain answer. Do–”
Charles surprised them by interrupting. “Pater, we may as well keep Howards End out of it,” he said.
“Why, Charles?”
Charles could give no reason; but Margaret felt as if, over tremendous distance, a salutation had passed between them.
“The whole house is at sixes and sevens,” he said crossly. “We don’t want any more mess.”
“Who’s ‘we’?” asked his father. “My boy, pray, who’s ‘we’?”
“I am sure I beg your pardon,” said Charles. “I appear always to be intruding.”
By now Margaret wished she had never mentioned her trouble to her husband. Retreat was impossible. He was determined to push the matter to a satisfactory conclusion, and Helen faded as he talked. Her fair, flying hair and eager eyes counted for nothing, for she was ill, without rights, and any of her friends might hunt her. Sick at heart, Margaret joined in the chase. She wrote her sister a lying letter, at her husband’s dictation; she said the furniture was all at Howards End, but could be seen on Monday next at 3 p.m., when a charwoman would be in attendance. It was a cold letter, and the more plausible for that. Helen would think she was offended. And on Monday next she and Henry were to lunch with Dolly, and then ambush themselves in the garden.
After they had gone, Mr. Wilcox said to his son: “I can’t have this sort of behaviour, my boy. Margaret’s too sweet-natured to mind, but I mind for her.”
Charles made no answer.
“Is anything wrong with you, Charles, this afternoon?”
“No, pater; but you may be taking on a bigger business than you reckon.”
“How?”
“Don’t ask me.”
Chapter 35
One speaks of the moods of spring, but the days that are her true children have only one mood; they are all full of the rising and dropping of winds, and the whistling of birds. New flowers may come out, the green embroidery of the hedges increase, but the same heaven broods overhead, soft, thick, and blue, the same figures, seen and unseen, are wandering by coppice and meadow. The morning that Margaret had spent with Miss Avery, and the afternoon she set out to entrap Helen, were the scales of a single balance. Time might never have moved, rain never have fallen, and man alone, with his schemes and ailments, was troubling Nature until he saw her through a veil of tears.
She protested no more. Whether Henry was right or wrong, he was most kind, and she knew of no other standard by which to judge him. She must trust him absolutely. As soon as he had taken up a business, his obtuseness vanished. He profited by the slightest indications, and the capture of Helen promised to be staged as deftly as the marriage of Evie.
They went down in the morning as arranged, and he discovered that their victim was actually in Hilton. On his arrival he called at all the livery-stables in the village, and had a few minutes’ serious conversation with the proprietors. What he said, Margaret did not know–perhaps not the truth; but news arrived after lunch that a lady had come by the London train, and had taken a fly to Howards End.
“She was bound to drive,” said Henry. “There will be her books.
“I cannot make it out,” said Margaret for the hundredth time.
“Finish your coffee, dear. We must be off.”
“Yes, Margaret, you know you must take plenty,” said Dolly.
Margaret tried, but suddenly lifted her hand to her eyes. Dolly stole glances at her father-in-law which he did not answer. In the silence the motor came round to the door.
“You’re not fit for it,” he said anxiously. “Let me go alone. I know exactly what to do.”
“Oh yes, I am fit,” said Margaret, uncovering her face. “Only most frightfully worried. I cannot feel that Helen is really alive. Her letters and telegrams seem to have come from someone else. Her voice isn’t in them. I don’t believe your driver really saw her at the station. I wish I’d never mentioned it. I know that Charles is vexed. Yes, he is–” She seized Dolly’s hand and kissed it. “There, Dolly will forgive me. There. Now we’ll be off.”
Henry had been looking at her closely. He did not like this breakdown.
“Don’t you want to tidy yourself?” he asked.
“Have I time?”
“Yes, plenty.”
She went to the lavatory by the front door, and as soon as the bolt slipped, Mr. Wilcox said quietly:
“Dolly, I’m going without her.”
Dolly’s eyes lit up with vulgar excitement. She followed him on tip-toe out to the car.
“Tell her I thought it best.”
“Yes, Mr. Wilcox, I see.”
“Say anything you like. All right.”
The car started well, and with ordinary luck would have got away. But Porgly-woggles, who was playing in the garden, chose this moment to sit down in the middle of the path. Crane, in trying to pass him, ran one wheel over a bed of wallflowers. Dolly screamed. Margaret, hearing the noise, rushed out hatless, and was in time to jump on the footboard. She said not a single word: he was only treating her as she had treated Helen, and her rage at his dishonesty only helped to indicate what Helen would feel against them. She thought, “I deserve it: I am punished for lowering my colours.” And she accepted his apologies with a calmness that astonished him.
“I still consider you are not fit for it,” he kept saying.
“Perhaps I was not at lunch. But the whole thing is spread clearly before me now.”
“I was meaning to act for the best.”
“Just lend me your scarf, will you? This wind takes one’s hair so.”
“Certainly, dear girl. Are you all right now?”
“Look! My hands have stopped trembling.”
“And have quite forgiven me? Then listen. Her cab should already have arrived at Howards End. (We’re a little late, but no matter.) Our first move will be to send it down to wait at the farm, as, if possible, one doesn’t want a scene before servants. A certain gentleman”–he pointed at Crane’s back–“won’t drive in, but will wait a little short of the front gate, behind the laurels. Have you still the keys of the house?”
“Yes.”
“Well, they aren’t wanted. Do you remember how the house stands?”
“Yes.”
“If we don’t find her in the porch, we can stroll round into the garden. Our object–”
Here they stopped to pick up the doctor.
“I was just saying to my wife, Mansbridge, that our main object is not to frighten Miss Schlegel. The house, as you know, is my property, so it should seem quite natural for us to be there. The trouble is evidently nervous–wouldn’t you say so, Margaret?”
The doctor, a very young man, began to ask questions about Helen. Was she normal? Was there anything congenital or hereditary? Had anything occurred that was likely to alienate her from her family?
“Nothing,” answered Margaret, wondering what would have happened if she had added: “Though she did resent my husband’s immorality.”
“She always was highly strung,” pursued Henry, leaning back in the car as it shot past the church. “A tendency to spiritualism and those things, though nothing serious. Musical, literary, artistic, but I should say normal–a very charming girl.”
Margaret’s anger and terror increased every moment. How dare these men label her sister! What horrors lay ahead! What impertinences that shelter under the name of science! The pack was turning on Helen, to deny her human rights, and it seemed to Margaret that all Schlegels were threatened with her. “Were they normal?” What a question to ask! And it is always those who know nothing about human nature, who are bored by psychology and shocked by physiology, who ask it. However piteous her sister’s state, she knew that she must be on her side. They would be mad together if the world chose to consider them so.
It was now five minutes past three. The car slowed down by the farm, in the yard of which Miss Avery was standing. Henry asked her whether a cab had gone past. She nodded, and the next moment they caught sight of it, at the end of the lane. The car ran silently like a beast of prey. So unsuspicious was Helen that she was sitting on the porch, with her back to the road. She had come. Only her head and shoulders were visible. She sat framed in the vine, and one of her hands played with the buds. The wind ruffled her hair, the sun glorified it; she was as she had always been.
Margaret was seated next to the door. Before her husband could prevent her, she slipped out. She ran to the garden gate, which was shut, passed through it, and deliberately pushed it in his face. The noise alarmed Helen. Margaret saw her rise with an unfamiliar movement, and, rushing into the porch, learnt the simple explanation of all their fears–her sister was with child.
“Is the truant all right?” called Henry.
She had time to whisper: “Oh, my darling–” The keys of the house were in her hand. She unlocked Howards End and thrust Helen into it. “Yes, all right,” she said, and stood with her back to the door.
Chapter 36
“Margaret, you look upset!” said Henry. Mansbridge had followed. Crane was at the gate, and the flyman had stood up on the box. Margaret shook her head at them; she could not speak any more. She remained clutching the keys, as if all their future depended on them. Henry was asking more questions. She shook her head again. His words had no sense. She heard him wonder why she had let Helen in. “You might have given me a knock with the gate,” was another of his remarks. Presently she heard herself speaking. She, or someone for her, said “Go away.” Henry came nearer. He repeated, “Margaret, you look upset again. My dear, give me the keys. What are you doing with Helen?”
“Oh, dearest, do go away, and I will manage it all.”
“Manage what?”
He stretched out his hand for the keys. She might have obeyed if it had not been for the doctor.
“Stop that at least,” she said piteously; the doctor had turned back, and was questioning the driver of Helen’s cab. A new feeling came over her; she was fighting for women against men. She did not care about rights, but if men came into Howards End, it should be over her body.
“Come, this is an odd beginning,” said her husband.
The doctor came forward now, and whispered two words to Mr. Wilcox–the scandal was out. Sincerely horrified, Henry stood gazing at the earth.
“I cannot help it,” said Margaret. “Do wait. It’s not my fault. Please all four of you to go away now.”
Now the flyman was whispering to Crane.
“We are relying on you to help us, Mrs. Wilcox,” said the young doctor. “Could you go in and persuade your sister to come out?”
“On what grounds?” said Margaret, suddenly looking him straight in the eyes.
Thinking it professional to prevaricate, he murmured something about a nervous breakdown.
“I beg your pardon, but it is nothing of the sort. You are not qualified to attend my sister, Mr. Mansbridge. If we require your services, we will let you know.”
“I can diagnose the case more bluntly if you wish,” he retorted.
“You could, but you have not. You are, therefore, not qualified to attend my sister.”
“Come, come, Margaret!” said Henry, never raising his eyes. “This is a terrible business, an appalling business. It’s doctor’s orders. Open the door.”
“Forgive me, but I will not.”
“I don’t agree.”
Margaret was silent.
“This business is as broad as it’s long,” contributed the doctor. “We had better all work together. You need us, Mrs. Wilcox, and we need you.”
“Quite so,” said Henry.
“I do not need you in the least,” said Margaret.
The two men looked at each other anxiously.
“No more does my sister, who is still many weeks from her confinement.”
“Margaret, Margaret!”
“Well, Henry, send your doctor away. What possible use is he now?”
Mr. Wilcox ran his eye over the house. He had a vague feeling that he must stand firm and support the doctor. He himself might need support, for there was trouble ahead.
“It all turns on affection now,” said Margaret. “Affection. Don’t you see?” Resuming her usual methods, she wrote the word on the house with her finger. “Surely you see. I like Helen very much, you not so much. Mr. Mansbridge doesn’t know her. That’s all. And affection, when reciprocated, gives rights. Put that down in your notebook, Mr. Mansbridge. It’s a useful formula.”
Henry told her to be calm.
“You don’t know what you want yourselves,” said Margaret, folding her arms. “For one sensible remark I will let you in. But you cannot make it. You would trouble my sister for no reason. I will not permit it. I’ll stand here all the day sooner.”
“Mansbridge,” said Henry in a low voice, “perhaps not now.”
The pack was breaking up. At a sign from his master, Crane also went back into the car.
“Now, Henry, you,” she said gently. None of her bitterness had been directed at him. “Go away now, dear. I shall want your advice later, no doubt. Forgive me if I have been cross. But, seriously, you must go.”
He was too stupid to leave her. Now it was Mr. Mansbridge who called in a low voice to him.
“I shall soon find you down at Dolly’s,” she called, as the gate at last clanged between them. The fly moved out of the way, the motor backed, turned a little, backed again, and turned in the narrow road. A string of farm carts came up in the middle; but she waited through all, for there was no hurry. When all was over and the car had started, she opened the door. “Oh, my darling!” she said. “My darling, forgive me.” Helen was standing in the hall.
Chapter 37
Margaret bolted the door on the inside. Then she would have kissed her sister, but Helen, in a dignified voice, that came strangely from her, said:
“Convenient! You did not tell me that the books were unpacked. I have found nearly everything that I want.
“I told you nothing that was true.”
“It has been a great surprise, certainly. Has Aunt Juley been ill?”
“Helen, you wouldn’t think I’d invent that?”
“I suppose not,” said Helen, turning away, and crying a very little. “But one loses faith in everything after this.”
“We thought it was illness, but even then–I haven’t behaved worthily.”
Helen selected another book.
“I ought not to have consulted anyone. What would our father have thought of me?”
She did not think of questioning her sister, nor of rebuking her. Both might be necessary in the future, but she had first to purge a greater crime than any that Helen could have committed–that want of confidence that is the work of the devil.
“Yes, I am annoyed,” replied Helen. “My wishes should have been respected. I would have gone through this meeting if it was necessary, but after Aunt Juley recovered, it was not necessary. Planning my life, as I now have to do–”
“Come away from those books,” called Margaret. “Helen, do talk to me.”
“I was just saying that I have stopped living haphazard. One can’t go through a great deal of”–she missed out the noun–“without planning one’s actions in advance. I am going to have a child in June, and in the first place conversations, discussions, excitement, are not good for me. I will go through them if necessary, but only then. In the second place I have no right to trouble people. I cannot fit in with England as I know it. I have done something that the English never pardon. It would not be right for them to pardon it. So I must live where I am not known.”
“But why didn’t you tell me, dearest?”
“Yes,” replied Helen judicially. “I might have, but decided to wait.”
” I believe you would never have told me.”
“Oh yes, I should. We have taken a flat in Munich.”
Margaret glanced out of window.
“By ‘we’ I mean myself and Monica. But for her, I am and have been and always wish to be alone.”
“I have not heard of Monica.”
“You wouldn’t have. She’s an Italian–by birth at least. She makes her living by journalism. I met her originally on Garda. Monica is much the best person to see me through.”
“You are very fond of her, then.”
“She has been extraordinarily sensible with me.”
Margaret guessed at Monica’s type–“Italiano Inglesiato” they had named it: the crude feminist of the South, whom one respects but avoids. And Helen had turned to it in her need!
“You must not think that we shall never meet,” said Helen, with a measured kindness. “I shall always have a room for you when you can be spared, and the longer you can be with me the better. But you haven’t understood yet, Meg, and of course it is very difficult for you. This is a shock to you. It isn’t to me, who have been thinking over our futures for many months, and they won’t be changed by a slight contretemps, such as this. I cannot live in England.”
“Helen, you’ve not forgiven me for my treachery. You COULDN’T talk like this to me if you had.”
“Oh, Meg dear, why do we talk at all?” She dropped a book and sighed wearily. Then, recovering herself, she said: “Tell me, how is it that all the books are down here?”
“Series of mistakes.”
“And a great deal of the furniture has been unpacked.”
“All.”
“Who lives here, then?”
“No one.”
“I suppose you are letting it though–”
“The house is dead,” said Margaret with a frown. “Why worry on about it?”
“But I am interested. You talk as if I had lost all my interest in life. I am still Helen, I hope. Now this hasn’t the feel of a dead house. The hall seems more alive even than in the old days, when it held the Wilcoxes’ own things.”
“Interested, are you? Very well, I must tell you, I suppose. My husband lent it on condition we–but by a mistake all our things were unpacked, and Miss Avery, instead of–” She stopped. “Look here, I can’t go on like this. I warn you I won’t. Helen, why should you be so miserably unkind to me, simply because you hate Henry?”
“I don’t hate him now,” said Helen. “I have stopped being a schoolgirl, and, Meg, once again, I’m not being unkind. But as for fitting in with your English life–no, put it out of your head at once. Imagine a visit from me at Ducie Street! It’s unthinkable.”
Margaret could not contradict her. It was appalling to see her quietly moving forward with her plans, not bitter or excitable, neither asserting innocence nor confessing guilt, merely desiring freedom and the company of those who would not blame her. She had been through–how much? Margaret did not know. But it was enough to part her from old habits as well as old friends.
“Tell me about yourself,” said Helen, who had chosen her books, and was lingering over the furniture.
“There’s nothing to tell.”
“But your marriage has been happy, Meg?”
“Yes, but I don’t feel inclined to talk.”
“You feel as I do.”
“Not that, but I can’t.”
“No more can I. It is a nuisance, but no good trying.”
Something had come between them. Perhaps it was Society, which henceforward would exclude Helen. Perhaps it was a third life, already potent as a spirit. They could find no meeting-place. Both suffered acutely, and were not comforted by the knowledge that affection survived.
“Look here, Meg, is the coast clear?”
“You mean that you want to go away from me?”
“I suppose so–dear old lady! it isn’t any use. I knew we should have nothing to say. Give my love to Aunt Juley and Tibby, and take more yourself than I can say. Promise to come and see me in Munich later.”
“Certainly, dearest.”
“For that is all we can do.”
It seemed so. Most ghastly of all was Helen’s common sense: Monica had been extraordinarily good for her.
“I am glad to have seen you and the things.” She looked at the bookcase lovingly, as if she was saying farewell to the past.
Margaret unbolted the door. She remarked: “The car has gone, and here’s your cab.”
She led the way to it, glancing at the leaves and the sky. The spring had never seemed more beautiful. The driver, who was leaning on the gate, called out, “Please, lady, a message,” and handed her Henry’s visiting-card through the bars.
“How did this come?” she asked.
Crane had returned with it almost at once.
She read the card with annoyance. It was covered with instructions in domestic French. When she and her sister had talked she was to come back for the night to Dolly’s. “Il faut dormir sur ce sujet.” While Helen was to be found “une comfortable chambre a l’hotel.” The final sentence displeased her greatly until she remembered that the Charles’ had only one spare room, and so could not invite a third guest.
“Henry would have done what he could,” she interpreted.
Helen had not followed her into the garden. The door once open, she lost her inclination to fly. She remained in the hall, going from bookcase to table. She grew more like the old Helen, irresponsible and charming.
“This is Mr. Wilcox’s house?” she inquired.
“Surely you remember Howards End?”
“Remember? I who remember everything! But it looks to be ours now.”
“Miss Avery was extraordinary,” said Margaret, her own spirits lightening a little. Again she was invaded by a slight feeling of disloyalty. But it brought her relief, and she yielded to it. “She loved Mrs. Wilcox, and would rather furnish her house with our things than think of it empty. In consequence here are all the library books. ”
“Not all the books. She hasn’t unpacked the Art Books, in which she may show her sense. And we never used to have the sword here.”
“The sword looks well, though.”
“Magnificent.”
“Yes, doesn’t it?”
“Where’s the piano, Meg?”
“I warehoused that in London. Why?”
“Nothing.”
“Curious, too, that the carpet fits.”
“The carpet’s a mistake,” announced Helen. “I know that we had it in London, but this floor ought to be bare. It is far too beautiful.”
“You still have a mania for under-furnishing. Would you care to come into the dining-room before you start? There’s no carpet there.
They went in, and each minute their talk became more natural.
“Oh, WHAT a place for mother’s chiffonier!” cried Helen.
“Look at the chairs, though.”
“Oh, look at them! Wickham Place faced north, didn’t it?”
“North-west.”
“Anyhow, it is thirty years since any of those chairs have felt the sun. Feel. Their little backs are quite warm.”
“But why has Miss Avery made them set to partners? I shall just–”
“Over here, Meg. Put it so that any one sitting will see the lawn.”
Margaret moved a chair. Helen sat down in it.
“Ye-es. The window’s too high.”
“Try a drawing-room chair.”
“No, I don’t like the drawing-room so much. The beam has been match-boarded. It would have been so beautiful otherwise. ”
“Helen, what a memory you have for some things! You’re perfectly right. It’s a room that men have spoilt through trying to make it nice for women. Men don’t know what we want–”
“And never will.”
“I don’t agree. In two thousand years they’ll know.”
“But the chairs show up wonderfully. Look where Tibby spilt the soup.”
“Coffee. It was coffee surely.”
Helen shook her head. “Impossible. Tibby was far too young to be given coffee at that time.”
“Was Father alive?”
“Yes.”
“Then you’re right and it must have been soup. I was thinking of much later–that unsuccessful visit of Aunt Juley’s, when she didn’t realize that Tibby had grown up. It was coffee then, for he threw it down on purpose. There was some rhyme, ‘Tea, coffee–coffee, tea,’ that she said to him every morning at breakfast. Wait a minute–how did it go?”
“I know–no, I don’t. What a detestable boy Tibby was!”
“But the rhyme was simply awful. No decent person could have put up with it.”
“Ah, that greengage tree,” cried Helen, as if the garden was also part of their childhood. “Why do I connect it with dumbbells? And there come the chickens. The grass wants cutting. I love yellow-hammers–”
Margaret interrupted her. “I have got it,” she announced.
‘Tea, tea, coffee, tea,
Or chocolaritee.’
“That every morning for three weeks. No wonder Tibby was wild.”
“Tibby is moderately a dear now,” said Helen.
“There! I knew you’d say that in the end. Of course he’s a dear.”
A bell rang.
“Listen! what’s that?”
Helen said, “Perhaps the Wilcoxes are beginning the siege.”
“What nonsense–listen!”
And the triviality faded from their faces, though it left something behind–the knowledge that they never could be parted because their love was rooted in common things. Explanations and appeals had failed; they had tried for a common meeting-ground, and had only made each other unhappy. And all the time their salvation was lying round them–the past sanctifying the present; the present, with wild heart-throb, declaring that there would after all be a future, with laughter and the voices of children. Helen, still smiling, came up to her sister. She said, “It is always Meg.” They looked into each other’s eyes. The inner life had paid.
Solemnly the clapper tolled. No one was in the front. Margaret went to the kitchen, and struggled between packing-cases to the window. Their visitor was only a little boy with a tin can. And triviality returned.
“Little boy, what do you want?”
“Please, I am the milk.”
“Did Miss Avery send you?” said Margaret, rather sharply.
“Yes, please.”
“Then take it back and say we require no milk.” While she called to Helen, “No, it’s not the siege, but possibly an attempt to provision us against one.”
“But I like milk,” cried Helen. “Why send it away?”
“Do you? Oh, very well. But we’ve nothing to put it in, and he wants the can.”
“Please, I’m to call in the morning for the can,” said the boy.
“The house will be locked up then.”
“In the morning would I bring eggs, too?”
“Are you the boy whom I saw playing in the stacks last week?”
The child hung his head.
“Well, run away and do it again.”
“Nice little boy,” whispered Helen. “I say, what’s your name? Mine’s Helen.”
“Tom.”
That was Helen all over. The Wilcoxes, too, would ask a child its name, but they never told their names in return.
“Tom, this one here is Margaret. And at home we’ve another called Tibby.”
“Mine are lop-eared,” replied Tom, supposing Tibby to be a rabbit.
“You’re a very good and rather a clever little boy. Mind you come again.–Isn’t he charming?”
“Undoubtedly,” said Margaret. “He is probably the son of Madge, and Madge is dreadful. But this place has wonderful powers.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know.”
“Because I probably agree with you.”
“It kills what is dreadful and makes what is beautiful live.”
“I do agree,” said Helen, as she sipped the milk. “But you said that the house was dead not half an hour ago.”
“Meaning that I was dead. I felt it.”
“Yes, the house has a surer life than we, even if it was empty, and, as it is, I can’t get over that for thirty years the sun has never shone full on our furniture. After all, Wickham Place was a grave. Meg, I’ve a startling idea.”
“What is it?”
“Drink some milk to steady you.”
Margaret obeyed.
“No, I won’t tell you yet,” said Helen, “because you may laugh or be angry. Let’s go upstairs first and give the rooms an airing.”
They opened window after window, till the inside, too, was rustling to the spring. Curtains blew, picture-frames tapped cheerfully. Helen uttered cries of excitement as she found this bed obviously in its right place, that in its wrong one. She was angry with Miss Avery for not having moved the wardrobes up. “Then one would see really.” She admired the view. She was the Helen who had written the memorable letters four years ago. As they leant out, looking westward, she said: “About my idea. Couldn’t you and I camp out in this house for the night?”
“I don’t think we could well do that,” said Margaret.
“Here are beds, tables, towels–”
“I know; but the house isn’t supposed to be slept in, and Henry’s suggestion was–”
“I require no suggestions. I shall not alter anything in my plans. But it would give me so much pleasure to have one night here with you. It will be something to look back on. Oh, Meg lovey, do let’s!”
“But, Helen, my pet,” said Margaret, “we can’t without getting Henry’s leave. Of course, he would give it, but you said yourself that you couldn’t visit at Ducie Street now, and this is equally intimate.”
“Ducie Street is his house. This is ours. Our furniture, our sort of people coming to the door. Do let us camp out, just one night, and Tom shall feed us on eggs and milk. Why not? It’s a moon.”
Margaret hesitated. “I feel Charles wouldn’t like it,” she said at last. “Even our furniture annoyed him, and I was going to clear it out when Aunt Juley’s illness prevented me. I sympathize with Charles. He feels it’s his mother’s house. He loves it in rather an untaking way. Henry I could answer for–not Charles.”
“I know he won’t like it,” said Helen. “But I am going to pass out of their lives. What difference will it make in the long run if they say, ‘And she even spent the night at Howards End’?”
“How do you know you’ll pass out of their lives? We have thought that twice before.”
“Because my plans–”
“–which you change in a moment.”
“Then because my life is great and theirs are little,” said Helen, taking fire. “I know of things they can’t know of, and so do you. We know that there’s poetry. We know that there’s death. They can only take them on hearsay. We know this is our house, because it feels ours. Oh, they may take the title-deeds and the doorkeys, but for this one night we are at home.”
“It would be lovely to have you once more alone,” said Margaret. “It may be a chance in a thousand.”
“Yes, and we could talk.” She dropped her voice. “It won’t be a very glorious story. But under that wych-elm–honestly, I see little happiness ahead. Cannot I have this one night with you?”
“I needn’t say how much it would mean to me.”
“Then let us.”
“It is no good hesitating. Shall I drive down to Hilton now and get leave?”
“Oh, we don’t want leave.”
But Margaret was a loyal wife. In spite of imagination and poetry–perhaps on account of them–she could sympathize with the technical attitude that Henry would adopt. If possible, she would be technical, too. A night’s lodging–and they demanded no more–need not involve the discussion of general principles.
“Charles may say no,” grumbled Helen.
“We shan’t consult him.”
“Go if you like; I should have stopped without leave.”
It was the touch of selfishness, which was not enough to mar Helen’s character, and even added to its beauty. She would have stopped without leave, and escaped to Germany the next morning. Margaret kissed her.
“Expect me back before dark. I am looking forward to it so much. It is like you to have thought of such a beautiful thing.”
“Not a thing, only an ending,” said Helen rather sadly; and the sense of tragedy closed in on Margaret again as soon as she left the house.
She was afraid of Miss Avery. It is disquieting to fulfil a prophecy, however superficially. She was glad to see no watching figure as she drove past the farm, but only little Tom, turning somersaults in the straw.
Chapter 38
The tragedy began quietly enough, and like many another talk, by the man’s deft assertion of his superiority. Henry heard her arguing with the driver, stepped out and settled the fellow, who was inclined to be rude, and then led the way to some chairs on the lawn. Dolly, who had not been “told,” ran out with offers of tea. He refused them, and ordered her to wheel baby’s perambulator away, as they desired to be alone.
“But the diddums can’t listen; he isn’t nine months old,” she pleaded.
“That’s not what I was saying,” retorted her father-in-law.
Baby was wheeled out of earshot, and did not hear about the crisis till later years. It was now the turn of Margaret.
“Is it what we feared?” he asked.
“It is.”
“Dear girl,” he began, “there is a troublesome business ahead of us, and nothing but the most absolute honesty and plain speech will see us through.” Margaret bent her head. “I am obliged to question you on subjects we’d both prefer to leave untouched. As you know, I am not one of your Bernard Shaws who consider nothing sacred. To speak as I must will pain me, but there are occasions–We are husband and wife, not children. I am a man of the world, and you are a most exceptional woman.”
All Margaret’s senses forsook her. She blushed, and looked past him at the Six Hills, covered with spring herbage. Noting her colour, he grew still more kind.
“I see that you feel as I felt when–My poor little wife! Oh, be brave! Just one or two questions, and I have done with you. Was your sister wearing a wedding-ring?”
Margaret stammered a “No.”
There was an appalling silence.
“Henry, I really came to ask a favour about Howards End.”
“One point at a time. I am now obliged to ask for the name of her seducer.”
She rose to her feet and held the chair between them. Her colour had ebbed, and she was grey. It did not displease him that she should receive his question thus.
“Take your time,” he counselled her. “Remember that this is far worse for me than for you.”
She swayed; he feared she was going to faint. Then speech came, and she said slowly: “Seducer? No; I do not know her seducer’s name.”
“Would she not tell you?”
“I never even asked her who seduced her,” said Margaret, dwelling on the hateful word thoughtfully.
“That is singular.” Then he changed his mind. “Natural perhaps, dear girl, that you shouldn’t ask. But until his name is known, nothing can be done. Sit down. How terrible it is to see you so upset! I knew you weren’t fit for it. I wish I hadn’t taken you.”
Margaret answered, “I like to stand, if you don’t mind, for it gives me a pleasant view of the Six Hills.”
“As you like.”
“Have you anything else to ask me, Henry?”
“Next you must tell me whether you have gathered anything. I have often noticed your insight, dear. I only wish my own was as good. You may have guessed something, even though your sister said nothing. The slightest hint would help us.”
“Who is ‘we’?”
“I thought it best to ring up Charles.”
“That was unnecessary,” said Margaret, growing warmer. “This news will give Charles disproportionate pain.”
“He has at once gone to call on your brother.”
“That too was unnecessary.”
“Let me explain, dear, how the matter stands. You don’t think that I and my son are other than gentlemen? It is in Helen’s interests that we are acting. It is still not too late to save her name.”
Then Margaret hit out for the first time. “Are we to make her seducer marry her?” she asked.
“If possible. Yes.”
“But, Henry, suppose he turned out to be married already? One has heard of such cases.”
“In that case he must pay heavily for his misconduct, and be thrashed within an inch of his life.”
So her first blow missed. She was thankful of it. What had tempted her to imperil both of their lives? Henry’s obtuseness had saved her as well as himself. Exhausted with anger, she sat down again, blinking at him as he told her as much as he thought fit. At last she said: “May I ask you my question now?”
“Certainly, my dear.”
“Tomorrow Helen goes to Munich–”
“Well, possibly she is right.”
“Henry, let a lady finish. Tomorrow she goes; tonight, with your permission, she would like to sleep at Howards End.”
It was the crisis of his life. Again she would have recalled the words as soon as they were uttered. She had not led up to them with sufficient care. She longed to warn him that they were far more important than he supposed. She saw him weighing them, as if they were a business proposition.
“Why Howards End?” he said at last. “Would she not be more comfortable, as I suggested, at the hotel?”
Margaret hastened to give him reasons. “It is an odd request, but you know what Helen is and what women in her state are.” He frowned, and moved irritably. “She has the idea that one night in your house would give her pleasure and do her good. I think she’s right. Being one of those imaginative girls, the presence of all our books and furniture soothes her. This is a fact. It is the end of her girlhood. Her last words to me were, ‘A beautiful ending.'”
“She values the old furniture for sentimental reasons, in fact.”
“Exactly. You have quite understood. It is her last hope of being with it.”
“I don’t agree there, my dear! Helen will have her share of the goods wherever she goes–possibly more than her share, for you are so fond of her that you’d give her anything of yours that she fancies, wouldn’t you? and I’d raise no objection. I could understand it if it was her old home, because a home, or a house”–he changed the word, designedly; he had thought of a telling point–“because a house in which one has once lived becomes in a sort of way sacred, I don’t know why. Associations and so on. Now Helen has no associations with Howards End, though I and Charles and Evie have. I do not see why she wants to stay the night there. She will only catch cold.”
“Leave it that you don’t see,” cried Margaret. “Call it fancy. But realize that fancy is a scientific fact. Helen is fanciful, and wants to.”
Then he surprised her–a rare occurrence. He shot an unexpected bolt. “If she wants to sleep one night, she may want to sleep two. We shall never get her out of the house, perhaps.”
“Well?” said Margaret, with the precipice in sight. “And suppose we don’t get her out of the house? Would it matter? She would do no one any harm.”
Again the irritated gesture.
“No, Henry,” she panted, receding. “I didn’t mean that. We will only trouble Howards End for this one night. I take her to London tomorrow–”
“Do you intend to sleep in a damp house, too?”
“She cannot be left alone.”
“That’s quite impossible! Madness. You must be here to meet Charles.”
“I have already told you that your message to Charles was unnecessary, and I have no desire to meet him.”
“Margaret–my Margaret–”
“What has this business to do with Charles? If it concerns me little, it concerns you less, and Charles not at all.”
“As the future owner of Howards End,” said Mr. Wilcox, arching his fingers, “I should say that it did concern Charles.”
“In what way? Will Helen’s condition depreciate the property?”
“My dear, you are forgetting yourself.”
“I think you yourself recommended plain speaking.”
They looked at each other in amazement. The precipice was at their feet now.
“Helen commands my sympathy,” said Henry. “As your husband, I shall do all for her that I can, and I have no doubt that she will prove more sinned against than sinning. But I cannot treat her as if nothing has happened. I should be false to my position in society if I did.”
She controlled herself for the last time. “No, let us go back to Helen’s request,” she said. “It is unreasonable, but the request of an unhappy girl. Tomorrow she will go to Germany, and trouble society no longer. Tonight she asks to sleep in your empty house–a house which you do not care about, and which you have not occupied for over a year. May she? Will you give my sister leave? Will you forgive her–as you hope to be forgiven, and as you have actually been forgiven? Forgive her for one night only. That will be enough.”
“As I have actually been forgiven–?”
“Never mind for the moment what I mean by that,” said Margaret. “Answer my question.”
Perhaps some hint of her meaning did dawn on him. If so, he blotted it out. Straight from his fortress he answered: “I seem rather unaccommodating, but I have some experience of life, and know how one thing leads to another. I am afraid that your sister had better sleep at the hotel. I have my children and the memory of my dear wife to consider. I am sorry, but see that she leaves my house at once.”
“You mentioned Mrs. Wilcox.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“A rare occurrence. In reply, may I mention Mrs. Bast?”
“You have not been yourself all day,” said Henry, and rose from his seat with face unmoved. Margaret rushed at him and seized both his hands. She was transfigured.
“Not any more of this!” she cried. “You shall see the connection if it kills you, Henry! You have had a mistress–I forgave you. My sister has a lover–you drive her from the house. Do you see the connection? Stupid, hypocritical, cruel–oh, contemptible! –a man who insults his wife when she’s alive and cants with her memory when she’s dead. A man who ruins a woman for his pleasure, and casts her off to ruin other men. And gives bad financial advice, and then says he is not responsible. These, man, are you. You can’t recognize them, because you cannot connect. I’ve had enough of your unweeded kindness. I’ve spoilt you long enough. All your life you have been spoiled. Mrs. Wilcox spoiled you. No one has ever told what you are–muddled, criminally muddled. Men like you use repentance as a blind, so don’t repent. Only say to yourself, ‘What Helen has done, I’ve done.'”
“The two cases are different,” Henry stammered. His real retort was not quite ready. His brain was still in a whirl, and he wanted a little longer.
“In what way different? You have betrayed Mrs. Wilcox, Helen only herself. You remain in society, Helen can’t. You have had only pleasure, she may die. You have the insolence to talk to me of differences, Henry?”
Oh, the uselessness of it! Henry’s retort came.
“I perceive you are attempting blackmail. It is scarcely a pretty weapon for a wife to use against her husband. My rule through life has been never to pay the least attention to threats, and I can only repeat what I said before: I do not give you and your sister leave to sleep at Howards End.”
Margaret loosed his hands. He went into the house, wiping first one and then the other on his handkerchief. For a little she stood looking at the Six Hills, tombs of warriors, breasts of the spring. Then she passed out into what was now the evening.
Chapter 39
Charles and Tibby met at Ducie Street, where the latter was staying. Their interview was short and absurd. They had nothing in common but the English language, and tried by its help to express what neither of them understood. Charles saw in Helen the family foe. He had singled her out as the most dangerous of the Schlegels, and, angry as he was, looked forward to telling his wife how right he had been. His mind was made up at once: the girl must be got out of the way before she disgraced them farther. If occasion offered she might be married to a villain or, possibly, to a fool. But this was a concession to morality, it formed no part of his main scheme. Honest and hearty was Charles’s dislike, and the past spread itself out very clearly before him; hatred is a skilful compositor. As if they were heads in a note-book, he ran through all the incidents of the Schlegels’ campaign: the attempt to compromise his brother, his mother’s legacy, his father’s marriage, the introduction of the furniture, the unpacking of the same. He had not yet heard of the request to sleep at Howards End; that was to be their master-stroke and the opportunity for his. But he already felt that Howards End was the objective, and, though he disliked the house, was determined to defend it.
Tibby, on the other hand, had no opinions. He stood above the conventions: his sister had a right to do what she thought right. It is not difficult to stand above the conventions when we leave no hostages among them; men can always be more unconventional than women, and a bachelor of independent means need encounter no difficulties at all. Unlike Charles, Tibby had money enough; his ancestors had earned it for him, and if he shocked the people in one set of lodgings he had only to move into another. His was the leisure without sympathy–an attitude as fatal as the strenuous: a little cold culture may be raised on it, but no art. His sisters had seen the family danger, and had never forgotten to discount the gold islets that raised them from the sea. Tibby gave all the praise to himself, and so despised the struggling and the submerged.
Hence the absurdity of the interview; the gulf between them was economic as well as spiritual. But several facts passed: Charles pressed for them with an impertinence that the undergraduate could not withstand. On what date had Helen gone abroad? To whom? (Charles was anxious to fasten the scandal on Germany.) Then, changing his tactics, he said roughly: “I suppose you realize that you are your sister’s protector?”
“In what sense?”
“If a man played about with my sister, I’d send a bullet through him, but perhaps you don’t mind.”
“I mind very much,” protested Tibby.
“Who d’ye suspect, then? Speak out, man. One always suspects someone.”
“No one. I don’t think so.” Involuntarily he blushed. He had remembered the scene in his Oxford rooms.
“You are hiding something,” said Charles. As interviews go, he got the best of this one. “When you saw her last, did she mention anyone’s name? Yes, or no!” he thundered, so that Tibby started.
“In my rooms she mentioned some friends, called the Basts–”
“Who are the Basts?”
“People–friends of hers at Evie’s wedding.”
“I don’t remember. But, by great Scott! I do. My aunt told me about some tag-rag. Was she full of them when you saw her? Is there a man? Did she speak of the man? Or–look here–have you had any dealings with him?”
Tibby was silent. Without intending it, he had betrayed his sister’s confidence; he was not enough interested in human life to see where things will lead to. He had a strong regard for honesty, and his word, once given, had always been kept up to now. He was deeply vexed, not only for the harm he had done Helen, but for the flaw he had discovered in his own equipment.
“I see–you are in his confidence. They met at your rooms. Oh, what a family, what a family! God help the poor pater–”
And Tibby found himself alone.
Chapter 40
Leonard–he would figure at length in a newspaper report, but that evening he did not count for much. The foot of the tree was in shadow, since the moon was still hidden behind the house. But above, to right, to left, down the long meadow the moonlight was streaming. Leonard seemed not a man, but a cause.
Perhaps it was Helen’s way of falling in love–a curious way to Margaret, whose agony and whose contempt of Henry were yet imprinted with his image. Helen forgot people. They were husks that had enclosed her emotion. She could pity, or sacrifice herself, or have instincts, but had she ever loved in the noblest way, where man and woman, having lost themselves in sex, desire to lose sex itself in comradeship?
Margaret wondered, but said no word of blame. This was Helen’s evening. Troubles enough lay ahead of her–the loss of friends and of social advantages, the agony, the supreme agony, of motherhood, which is even yet not a matter of common knowledge. For the present let the moon shine brightly and the breezes of the spring blow gently, dying away from the gale of the day, and let the earth, who brings increase, bring peace. Not even to herself dare she blame Helen. She could not assess her trespass by any moral code; it was everything or nothing. Morality can tell us that murder is worse than stealing, and group most sins in an order all must approve, but it cannot group Helen. The surer its pronouncements on this point, the surer may we be that morality is not speaking. Christ was evasive when they questioned Him. It is those that cannot connect who hasten to cast the first stone.
This was Helen’s evening–won at what cost, and not to be marred by the sorrows of others. Of her own tragedy Margaret never uttered a word.
“One isolates,” said Helen slowly. “I isolated Mr. Wilcox from the other forces that were pulling Leonard downhill. Consequently, I was full of pity, and almost of revenge. For weeks I had blamed Mr. Wilcox only, and so, when your letters came–”
“I need never have written them,” sighed Margaret. “They never shielded Henry. How hopeless it is to tidy away the past, even for others!”
“I did not know that it was your own idea to dismiss the Basts.”
“Looking back, that was wrong of me.”
“Looking back, darling, I know that it was right. It is right to save the man whom one loves. I am less enthusiastic about justice now. But we both thought you wrote at his dictation. It seemed the last touch of his callousness. Being very much wrought up by this time–and Mrs. Bast was upstairs. I had not seen her, and had talked for a long time to Leonard–I had snubbed him for no reason, and that should have warned me I was in danger. So when the notes came I wanted us to go to you for an explanation. He said that he guessed the explanation–he knew of it, and you mustn’t know. I pressed him to tell me. He said no one must know; it was something to do with his wife. Right up to the end we were Mr. Bast and Miss Schlegel. I was going to tell him that he must be frank with me when I saw his eyes, and guessed that Mr. Wilcox had ruined him in two ways, not one. I drew him to me. I made him tell me. I felt very lonely myself. He is not to blame. He would have gone on worshipping me. I want never to see him again, though it sounds appalling. I wanted to give him money and feel finished. Oh, Meg, the little that is known about these things!”
She laid her face against the tree.
“The little, too, that is known about growth! Both times it was loneliness, and the night, and panic afterwards. Did Leonard grow out of Paul?”
Margaret did not speak for a moment. So tired was she that her attention had actually wandered to the teeth–the teeth that had been thrust into the tree’s bark to medicate it. From where she sat she could see them gleam. She had been trying to count them. “Leonard is a better growth than madness,” she said. “I was afraid that you would react against Paul until you went over the verge.”
“I did react until I found poor Leonard. I am steady now. I shan’t ever like your Henry, dearest Meg, or even speak kindly about him, but all that blinding hate is over. I shall never rave against Wilcoxes any more. I understand how you married him, and you will now be very happy.”
Margaret did not reply.
“Yes,” repeated Helen, her voice growing more tender, “I do at last understand.”
“Except Mrs. Wilcox, dearest, no one understands our little movements.”
“Because in death–I agree.”
“Not quite. I feel that you and I and Henry are only fragments of that woman’s mind. She knows everything. She is everything. She is the house, and the tree that leans over it. People have their own deaths as well as their own lives, and even if there is nothing beyond death, we shall differ in our nothingness. I cannot believe that knowledge such as hers will perish with knowledge such as mine. She knew about realities. She knew when people were in love, though she was not in the room. I don’t doubt that she knew when Henry deceived her.”
“Good-night, Mrs. Wilcox,” called a voice.
“Oh, good-night, Miss Avery.”
“Why should Miss Avery work for us?” Helen murmured.
“Why, indeed?”
Miss Avery crossed the lawn and merged into the hedge that divided it from the farm. An old gap, which Mr. Wilcox had filled up, had reappeared, and her track through the dew followed the path that he had turfed over, when he improved the garden and made it possible for games.
“This is not quite our house yet,” said Helen. “When Miss Avery called, I felt we are only a couple of tourists.”
“We shall be that everywhere, and for ever.”
“But affectionate tourists–”
“But tourists who pretend each hotel is their home.”
“I can’t pretend very long,” said Helen. “Sitting under this tree one forgets, but I know that tomorrow I shall see the moon rise out of Germany. Not all your goodness can alter the facts of the case. Unless you will come with me.”
Margaret thought for a moment. In the past year she had grown so fond of England that to leave it was a real grief. Yet what detained her? No doubt Henry would pardon her outburst, and go on blustering and muddling into a ripe old age. But what was the good? She had just as soon vanish from his mind.
“Are you serious in asking me, Helen? Should I get on with your Monica?”
“You would not, but I am serious in asking you.”
“Still, no more plans now. And no more reminiscences.”
They were silent for a little. It was Helen’s evening.
The present flowed by them like a stream. The tree rustled. It had made music before they were born, and would continue after their deaths, but its song was of the moment. The moment had passed. The tree rustled again. Their senses were sharpened, and they seemed to apprehend life. Life passed. The tree nestled again.
“Sleep now,” said Margaret.
The peace of the country was entering into her. It has no commerce with memory, and little with hope. Least of all is it concerned with the hopes of the next five minutes. It is the peace of the present, which passes understanding. Its murmur came “now,” and “now” once more as they trod the gravel, and “now,” as the moonlight fell upon their father’s sword. They passed upstairs, kissed, and amidst the endless iterations fell asleep. The house had enshadowed the tree at first, but as the moon rose higher the two disentangled, and were clear for a few moments at midnight. Margaret awoke and looked into the garden. How incomprehensible that Leonard Bast should have won her this night of peace! Was he also part of Mrs. Wilcox’s mind?
Chapter 41
Far different was Leonard’s development. The months after Oniton, whatever minor troubles they might bring him, were all overshadowed by Remorse. When Helen looked back she could philosophize, or she could look into the future and plan for her child. But the father saw nothing beyond his own sin. Weeks afterwards, in the midst of other occupations, he would suddenly cry out, “Brute–you brute, I couldn’t have–” and be rent into two people who held dialogues. Or brown rain would descend, blotting out faces and the sky. Even Jacky noticed the change in him. Most terrible were his sufferings when he awoke from sleep. Sometimes he was happy at first, but grew conscious of a burden hanging to him and weighing down his thoughts when they would move. Or little irons scorched his body. Or a sword stabbed him. He would sit at the edge of his bed, holding his heart and moaning, “Oh what SHALL I do, whatever SHALL I do?” Nothing brought ease. He could put distance between him and the trespass, but it grew in his soul.
Remorse is not among the eternal verities. The Greeks were right to dethrone her. Her action is too capricious, as though the Erinyes selected for punishment only certain men and certain sins. And of all means to regeneration Remorse is surely the most wasteful. It cuts away healthy